I'm still new at this.

How did it get to be so long between posts again?  I'll tell you.  I wrote the last post in a hurry.  I didn't want to continue going on and on, and I didn't even really want to read over it.  I was over it.  I am over it.  We moved.  We did it.  And the truth is change isn't easy for me.

I've been feeling a bit claustrophobic lately.  A bit suffocated.  We have moved somewhere with plenty of wide open space and honestly?  I was starting to feel like it was too much.

I told myself "There's a Kmart here, a Safeway, a CVS. Anything we NEED we'll be able to get it."  It made me feel better for a few weeks.  Then the leaves starting turning, the weather began changing and I got a bit panicked.  After living in Southern California for 5 years my fall wardrobe is a bit limited.  My winter wardrobe?  Non existent. 

Part of the problem (the whole problem) is that I weigh 30 pounds more than I did when I got married (5 years ago).  I needed new clothes!  Suddenly driving an hour to the closest Kohl's, Old Navy, Carter's (gotta keep the kiddo warm!), and a big huge (beautiful mall) with a Gap, Nordstrom's, etc. seemed really far.  Doing that drive alone with a toddler To!Go!Clothes!Shopping! a nightmarish idea.  The whole thing had me a bit stressed.  

Sound pathetic?  Well it probably is.  However, it's new to me.  Our town, the long drive to get to a metropolis area, all that.. it's new to me.  Luckily my parents came to visit this week and my mom joined Declan and I for the trip.  Boy did that make all the difference.  Extra hands are the most amazing thing when you are shopping, I got to take my time.  Mission accomplished.  I still need a winter coat, I'm trying to decide if buying online is a terrible idea.  

Anyway the point is, we're here.  We've moved.  I am not ready to look back right now.  It's hard enough to start a new life, looking backwards while you are trying to restart is no way to succeed.  I know that from experience.  So I'm putting a halt on any plans to post about those things for now.  It's time to look to our future, get out there and meet people.  Get a library card, look at churches, start our life outside our home.

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What do I plan to do now?  (She thought to herself...)

-Use the blog to work on a writing style.  Right now I'm all over the place.  It's been a long time since I put pen to paper.

-Document our new life, look to the future.

-Do flashback posts, a baby book of sorts. I regret not doing this from when Declan was a baby.

-Push fear out of my mind and do this because I want to do it.

-Work on my photography, editing skills, etc.  Use this place to display some of it and hopefully get some tips/pointers/feedback.  It's something I do only for fun, to document. I'm a DSLR newb and loving it.